-15

Here is what I wrote, it was in regards to an accusatory comment made to me which was so insulting, that I responded thus,

I knew you'd come up with some kind of sophomoric response like that, and since my ancestors were thrown in those pits not yours don't lecture me about it. I wasn't comparing his suspension, I was talking about the broad sweeping statement you made that was almost offensive.

This was in reference to a holocaust comment. Was that comment inappropriate?

Should I have been blocked by a mod/cm for that?

And why don't I get to know which mod/cm blocked me after that comment?

  • 13
    Just to be clear, the "insulting comment" made to you that you're referring to is the one where you were politely asked not to equate a 7-day SE suspension with the holocaust? – KutuluMike Oct 28 '15 at 3:53
  • 5
    I assume you're talking about your recent chat suspensions. They were both automatic suspension when a mod or five 10k users validated the flags against your messages. There is no record of who in particular validated it. – Kevin Oct 28 '15 at 4:00
  • @kevin why did you delete my comment/question? Again I gave you a complement saying you were a fair mod, to the response of others that you were not, and so I'm curious if you were responsible for my being blocked not just once but twice for absolutely nothing. – JMFB Oct 28 '15 at 4:27
  • @MikeEdenfield so they're censoring my comments as well? awesome I can keep this up as well. I did not equate anything to the holocaust. I am deeply offended by your suggestion that I did since my family was killed in it not yours. – JMFB Oct 28 '15 at 4:28
  • 4
    I have no idea what you're talking about but I think you should take a moment to relax and reconsider what you're doing here, as I think you are letting things run wildly out of hand. And, since you asked, I wasn't even at my computer when your first ban happened; I had nothing to do with it. I merely read the transcript to find the comment you claimed insulted you, and reported my findings to provide context to your question. – KutuluMike Oct 28 '15 at 4:31
  • 2
    @JMFB I did not delete your comment, another mod did. And I had nothing to do with your chat suspensions either; I just looked up what had happened, which was ostensibly your whole motivation for asking this question. – Kevin Oct 28 '15 at 4:42
11

Yes, that was inappropriate

From the Chat FAQ:

Do I have to be nice?

Yes. We expect community members to treat each other with respect … even when they don't deserve it.

And from Rule Number 1, the Be Nice Policy:

  1. Rudeness and belittling language are not okay. Your tone should match the way you'd talk in person with someone you respect and whom you want to respect you. If you don't have time to say something politely, just leave it for someone who does.

  2. Be welcoming, be patient, and assume good intentions. Don't expect new users to know all the rules — they don't. And be patient while they learn. If you're here for help, make it as easy as possible for others to help you. Everyone here is volunteering, and no one responds well to demands for help.

  3. Don't be a jerk. These are just a few examples. If you see them, flag them:

    • Name-calling. Focus on the post, not the person. That includes terms that feel personal even when they're applied to posts (like "lazy", "ignorant", or "whiny").

    • Bigotry of any kind. Language likely to offend or alienate individuals or groups based on race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, etc. will not be tolerated. At all. (Those are just a few examples; when in doubt, just don't.)

    • Inappropriate language or attention. Avoid vulgar terms and anything sexually suggestive. Also, this is not a dating site.

    • Harassment and bullying. If you see a hostile interaction, flag it. If it keeps up, disengage — we'll handle it. If something needs staff attention, you can use the contact us link at the bottom of every page.

And now my two cents: It's totally fine that you were offended. You have every right to be offended by comments made by another user.

However, the way you chose to express that was inappropriate. If you're offended, the proper course of action is to flag the offensive post, not to lash out.

Responding to an offensive comment1 with a confrontational comment of your own benefits nobody. At best, the other person doesn't respond and you're just sitting there fuming. At worst, they respond with another confrontational comment, and on and on we go. Nobody wins, everyone loses.

Why can't you see who suspended you?

As Kevin says in a comment on the question, you were suspended automatically. Your chat profile looks like this:

enter image description here

As animuson says on Meta.SE:

This user has been automatically suspended for posting inappropriate content and cannot chat for 1 hour 2 minutes.

The ban was triggered by the links simply being deleted due to flags, no one user or even a moderator was involved in suspending you.

The specific of that linked question don't really apply here, but the general guideline is what's important: multiple users approve the flag, you get auto-suspended.

Regarding learning who handled the flag, Shog9 explains in a comment on this post:

Trivia: there are actually no tools that show who handled a flag; employees can retrieve that information from the database manually if need-be, but it's not exactly convenient for anyone. Might be worth exposing this information to moderators at some point, but as your answer demonstrates it's generally easy enough to figure out what happened without it.


1 I'm not passing a judgement on the offensiveness or inoffensiveness of the other comment. JMFB was offended by it, so to him it was offensive. That's enough for my purposes.

  • Instead of posting two paragraphs of bs, can you specifically give me the exact part of my quote that qualifies under any of the stuff you wrote. I did not harass, bully, name call, was bigoted, or use inappropriate langauge. But glad to know you're on the bandwagon as well. – JMFB Oct 28 '15 at 4:23
  • 10
    @JMFB As you wish. "Sophomoric response" is namecalling; "my ancestors were thrown into those pits not yours" is either bigotry or harassment (if you disagree, consider how you would feel if I said that to you). Nothing about that post assumes good intentions; it is rude, argumentative, and frankly made me uncomfortable to be in chat. – Jason Baker Oct 28 '15 at 4:37
  • 3
    Trivia: there are actually no tools that show who handled a flag; employees can retrieve that information from the database manually if need-be, but it's not exactly convenient for anyone. Might be worth exposing this information to moderators at some point, but as your answer demonstrates it's generally easy enough to figure out what happened without it. – Shog9 Oct 28 '15 at 4:37
  • @Shog9 Thanks for the info; hope you don't mind that I copy-pasted it in – Jason Baker Oct 28 '15 at 4:39
3

Assuming that the "insulting comment" made to you is the one where you were asked not to equate a 7-day SE suspension with the holocaust...

I wouldn't have flagged your comment as being insulting, but it seems a bit over the top to me.

And then the flagging system for chat rooms can be a problem. Anyone who's reached 10k total rep (across multiple SE sites) gets flag notifications and can act on them. So generally when something is flagged it gets dealt with instantly, but not necessarily be people who are familiar with a room, its norms, and its regulars.

  • I want to know specifically what I wrote that was worthy of a ban, to the contrary. His comment was completely out of order especially with the anti-semitic comments he's made in the past, which I of course have recorded and gave him the benefit of the doubt until now. So specifically I want to know what I did wrong "SPECIFICALLY" and who voted to block me. I'm not letting this one go and I am taking it to the higher ups in the company. – JMFB Oct 28 '15 at 4:25
  • 2
    No one on this site can tell you what you want to know. If that information is available at all, it will only be available to the CMs or higher. – KutuluMike Oct 28 '15 at 4:29
  • 3
    @JMFB You're almost certainly wasting your time if you don't let it go... Chat bans are not that big a deal, they're not like site suspensions. And in this case, where multiple people think your comment was out of line, why would SE spend the time digging in to the database? – Ward Oct 28 '15 at 6:56
0

Jason has given you a good summary of the SE rules on the matter, but what you really want to know is, of course, who did what to whom, without any wrapping of bureaucratic language.

I'm not a mod, so I don't know any specifics of your case, but I can tell you what you need to know about how the suspension system works in general. (And just in case you suspect me, I wasn't involved in any of it; I'd gone to bed by the time all this happened.)

1. Someone flagged you

The comment you made in chat got flagged. Anybody can flag - you don't need to have 10k rep or anything. If there is a rep limit, it'll be something tiny like 20 rep. Impossible to find out who, unless you're a CM: not even mods can tell at this point.

If it was a mod who flagged you, that would have got you a 30-minute auto-suspension. If it wasn't, we move on to stage 2...

2. The flag was validated

Assuming it wasn't a mod who flagged you, the flag needed validation from six 10k+ users (or one mod) in order for you to get that 30-minute auto-suspension. That means six users with at least 10k rep network-wide, or one mod, agreed with the original flagger that your comment was inappropriate. Again, impossible to find out who, maybe even for CMs. Most of the active chat users on SFF do have more than 10k rep, so you can't even narrow the field much.


I'm sorry to see that you've now been suspended on the main site. Without attempting to justify this action, I can't say I'm surprised. SE doesn't tolerate people expressing their feelings in certain ways, and if someone is saying things the moderators don't want to hear, it's always possible for them to suspend you. Suspensions can be reversed, but that happens only very rarely. You will have received a suspension message from either one of the site mods or a CM, to which you can reply if you want to appeal the suspension (or just tell them what you think of them). I wouldn't recommend it though - it's only for a day, and no action is likely to be taken that quickly.

You've already expressed displeasure with the way this site is run and decisions that have been made by some high-up people. Receiving this suspension must have only exacerbated your annoyance. I'm sorry that you have to go through this. I hope we'll still see you around - there are plenty of us on SFF.SE who like and respect you - but I'll understand if you decide not to participate on SE any more after this.

  • 1
    Thanks I appreciate it. Don't worry. I lodged a complaint that was by no surprise intercepted by somebody who would not want it going higher up. I am going to send a certified letter to the people who actually run the site, not low level employees, and also to the funders of the site. I'll be inviting others to participate and set up an email that we can converse outside of prying eyes. I'll post details on meta here later when i have more time. – JMFB Oct 29 '15 at 20:36

You must log in to answer this question.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged .